i'm a big girl now.

your lookin at a registered student at Moorpark College.
weeeeeeeeew parents are gonna be so proud.

iwrite

no more of this free falling, my rope is gonna snap soon.
it feels great to swing and drift, drag my nails against the moon but

so many crumbs fall from my loaf, little nothings create a mess
slide the pile to the side
denial denial
oh gluttony of the selfish soul
keep stuffing
pushing
away the blemishes on my soul wont leave

swinging

add another brick to the wall
hiding everything i fear
confront
the disaster, the failure,
i've stepped on my glasses
broken
now my vision is all obscured
cracks
dents
holes
make these steps
this shortcut on the edge of the cliff
seem right

fading

jumping from island to island
with no destination
my treasure map was a trap
and although my ship is anchored
it can still drag away

flying is for fairy tales,
grow up

use your census

I'm searching for a new perfume, a spring/summer scent. I'm thinking something with jasmine or hints of Ralph Lauren Blue. mmmmm it's also gotta smell like this vvvvvvvvvv

heart-shaped box

Try and focus on the vision and triPpY art, not just the sexy screen time Kurt gets

silience is loud, i hear the noise already. my head is heavy with thoughts it might just wobble and roll off, over the sheets and under the bed, goodnight worries. Deflate this balloon while I nap ? No, forever the noise wraps over my shoulders as a backpack and weighs down my steps forward. Left Right Left Right

absorb

When the world arises in me,

It is just an illusion:

Water shimmering in the sun,

A vein of silver in mother-of-pearl,

A serpent in a strand of rope.



From me the world streams out

And in me it dissolves,

As a bracelet melts into gold,

A pot crumbles into clay,

A wave subsides into water.



- Ashtavakra Gita 2: 9-10

fortune teller

Don't ever slam a door; you might want to go back.

i love shoe

quilk

every time I look around

only a mermaid could wear it..

BUT I WANT IT! I spotted this Emily Miranda claw cuff, and want it badly!It's like wearing a tide pool on your wrist.Seeing as I'm no Ms. Money Bags, I am going to try and re-create it, along with designing a few of my own special cuffs. I went into Forever 21 today, and saw that their cuffs are pretty cheap, so I plan to buy some and mess around with a glue gun and 'little treasures' to decorate them. I'm thinking anything you'd see in those old I Spy Books, would work perfectly.

...But I still want this one, so someone needs to buy if for me.

colouring my fingertips

I creativly painted my nails in a tribal fashion.
But I wish I was this pro..(check out the diet coke one haha)

nothing like a good friend(s).

Lately, I've been missing my friends back at home a lot. (probably because I'm anxious to finally come home) I feel like I was blessed with the best friends anyone could ask for, I'm totally serious. I've got a handful of best friends and they all bring out a different side of me that I love. Although I've got my girls Heidi and Kerry up here in Utah, I still need my other friends who bring out sides that I don't see without their help. Here's a little spotlight on each of my lovelies.

Kerry has always been there for me, she's shared way too many memories with me and opened my eyes to so many things about myself . Even when she lived in Utah and I was still in HS, we talked on the phone almost every day. She brings out my annoying-crazy side along with my deeper side. She is the friend I know will always be there, even if I don't see her for a year- I know that when I do, she will still be my sincere, listening, beautiful, creative friend. There's so much more to say, and I love her!

Dominique is my clone/twin, i think. We have got the same exact humor, and we both find each other hilarious. Dom is honestly like a sister to me- I love her family almost as much as I love mine, and I think she has a crush on my mom (they get along really well, it's creepy) Dom could stay at my house for weeks and I would not get sick of waking up to her staring at me with a demented smile haha. I have gone through so much with this lady, and miss tanning in my backyard with her. Love you Dommy.

Kimmy Dang has been my friend since early freshman year. This girl is the most beautiful thing you'll ever see, she's got a presence about her, and you can't not notice her. Her and I have a friendship on a really deep level, where we talk about how much we love each other (not in a lesbian way) and start to cry.. She gets my taste just as much as I get it. She's also the sweetest girl, and never puts herself first, ever. She will always want the other person to take the first bite, choose where we go... simply wants everyone to be happy. I love her so so much.

Elise has been one of my best friends since 7th grade, when I first moved to Newbury Park. It doesn't matter if I don't see her for years, right when I do, it's the same. She is the friend that I can drive around aimlessly with, watch junk TV, pretty much do nothing at all and still have a ball. She has a great personality and I love her cynical side ahha. We have been through everything together and she knows everything about me, as I do with her. She deserves way more credit and love than her family and old boyfriends ever gave her, and I know she'll always be around, love you.

Heidi is like my girlfriend.. we thrive off of each other's annoying sides and it gets a little out of control. She knows alot about me, but doesn't judge me for my decisions. She is such a kind person and I love dancing, driving, sleeping over, and talking with her. She's always making me laugh, and I love when she laughs at my jokes with her hysteric giggle. She and I go way back and I know we'll always be in contact. Love my Heidster.

These aren't in any order, and I love you all. I don't know what I'd do without any of these gals. xo

spring cleaning... for my tummy

The other day I learned that we all have about 10-15 lbs of crappy-junk encrusted around the inside of our stomach...So I decided to try out this Master Cleanse, 10-day detox, for a spin. Pretty much, each morning I drink an herbal ..laxative.. tea, then all throughout the day I am restriced to a drink consisting of lemon juice, cayanne pepper, maple syrup, and water. Whenever I get hungry, I have to drink this "lemonade" along with lots of water. Then at night I have to pound down a "salt-water flush", made of water and uniodized sea salt. This will awaken the bowels and...."flush" me out. So... lots of downtime with my toilet..yeah. But apparently the majority of people who do it, the right way, lose 10-15 lbs. I start my journey tommorrow morning, wish me luck?

dusting off and shining up

inspiration: my mexican friend, dominique quezada.
I have decided to amp up my little blog and start some regular postin again, seeing as my life is so exciting.